Active Building

Marriage is an ongoing project requiring dedication, love, and practical wisdom. As Timothy Keller, author of The Meaning of Marriage, says, "Marriage is glorious but hard. It's a burning joy and strength, and yet it is also blood, sweat, and tears, humbling defeats and exhausting victories." Here are just a few of how that consistent, active dedication could look like:

1. Frequent Communication: Regular (daily) check-ins and conversation.
2. Quality Time: Intentional moments together.
3. Prayer: Consistent prayer for each other.

“To have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part.” This well-known vow encapsulates a myriad of experiences and challenges that a couple might face (Book of Common Prayer). Spending time considering this vow is a worthy exercise. While your vows may be very different when it comes time to say them, there will likely be an element of "no matter what."

Love and Respect

The Book of Ephesians (5:22-33) offers some guidance around our roles in marriage, emphasizing mutual respect and selfless love: “However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” — Ephesians 5:33  

Dr. Emerson Eggerichs holds that the cycle of love and respect is foundational. “Wives are made to love, want to love, and expect love. Husbands are made to be respected, want respect, and expect respect.” Colossians 3:14 also instructs us to put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. This harmony is not a state but a process. Again - it demands ongoing attention and care.

Getting Practical: Walking the Talk

While principles are essential, it's the daily actions that manifest them. Whether it's taking time to listen, making sacrifices, or planning date nights, active building is about investing in your relationship continually.