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Finances
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Ah, the subject of money—a frequent spark for relational wildfires. How you manage your finances can either fuel conflicts or prevent them. Consider what you might have heard from couples in the past - be it in your own home growing up or from others you have been around.
| Financial Conflict | What you might hear | |
|---|---|---|
| Overspending | "I can't believe you spent that much on shoes! We have bills to pay." | |
| Hidden Purchases | "Why did you hide this from me? We're supposed to be transparent about our spending." | |
| Budgeting Disagreements | "We don't need to budget for eating out every week. It's a waste of money." | |
| Debt | "You have how much student loan debt? Why didn't you tell me before?" | |
| Investing Risks | "You want to put our savings into stocks? Are you kidding me?" | |
| Income Inequality | "You make twice as much as I do but expect me to split the bills equally?" | |
| Financial Goals | "Retirement is years away. I'd rather enjoy my money now." | |
| Charitable Giving | "Why did you donate so much without discussing it with me first?" | |
| Financial Infidelity | "You opened a credit card in your name only? What else are you hiding?" | |
| Emergency Fund | "An emergency fund is for emergencies, not a new TV." | |
The Importance of Budgeting
A budget can serve as a neutral third party in your financial discussions. When both partners agree on a budget, it eliminates much of the personal friction. Proverbs 22:7 cautions us: "The rich rule over the poor, and the borrower is slave to the lender." Wisdom in financial stewardship is not just good practice; it's a scriptural principle.
Sharon used the envelope system to manage discretionary spending, which empowered her to make wiser choices without feeling restricted. Jay argued that making the budget the “bad guy” could reduce interpersonal strain. In both instances, we see that there are actionable steps couples can take. Whether it is the envelope system, creating a joint budget, or regularly reviewing financial goals - don’t neglect to ever have the conversation.