The Discipline of Humility

In his video, Dr. Buckingham talks about how many leaders with great gifts that God has given them remind him of a cow his father owned that produced large amounts of milk but then would kick over the pail. The lesson is that we often self-sabotage when God has given us so much that he can use if we could only get out of our own way.

Pride is not the only enemy of humility. Fear can also be its enemy when we cannot handle criticism without getting defensive. In both cases, not only do we not see ourselves as we are. We are not even seeing ourselves as others really see us. In the latter case, they may think highly of us while we are paranoid that they secretly look down on us.

Ultimately, we are going to need the help of the Spirit to gain and keep perspective. “God has not given us a spirit of fear” (2 Tim. 1:7), but the Devil sometimes preys on the weakness of our flesh. It’s easy for us to read, “Be anxious for nothing” ( Phil. 4:6) and “Don’t worry about your life” (Matt. 6:25). It is much, much harder to put it into practice. We not only need the Spirit’s power, but we may also need help from trusted brothers and sisters in the body of Christ.

It is so easy to become obsessed with what others think of us, whether from fear or pride. The first step is to recognize we are doing it. If you think about it, such obsessions reflect an inflated sense of our self-importance. They can bind us to perpetual anxiety.

First, let us get clear in our heads the fact that everything that exists is for the glory of God. God did not need to create the universe. God created it out of the over-abundance of his love and desire to give. Although it’s much easier to say than to do, why would we worry about ourselves when everything is really about God?

Jesus also modeled an other-centeredness when he came to earth. He “emptied himself” of his divine privileges and power when he came to earth (Phil. 2:7). Even as a human being, he humbled himself and became obedient to death, even a horrible death on a cross (Phil. 2:8). This radical selflessness stands in stark contrast to a world that often encourages self-promotion and the creation of curated public personas. 

If Jesus was this selfless toward others – and he was God – surely we should pry our fingers off our fears and pride and surrender ourselves to the benefit of others, whatever that might mean for us. Again, it is easy to say, but fully acknowledging that we are “third” on the priority list after God and others is an important step.

If insecurity is our problem, then recognizing God’s immense love for us is also a key step toward wholeness and true humility. Humility does not despise ourselves. It values ourselves in proper perspective. A preoccupation with the opinions of others often stems from a need for validation, recognition, or fear of judgment. It is rooted in the belief that our worth is determined by external appraisal. This perspective stands at odds with the Christian understanding that our value is intrinsic, given by God, and is independent of external opinions. “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:13-14). Humility helps us internalize this reality.

The discipline of humility, when practiced authentically, liberates us from the exhausting endeavor of living up to external expectations. It offers freedom from the tyranny of public opinion, grounding us in the unwavering love of God and our inherent worth in Him.